All to often I find myself sitting alone in a room while Stryker is down for a nap, just thinking. The television is off, the light is coming in from the blinds and everything is peaceful and serene. Then all of a sudden I squeeze my eyes shut or cover my face with my hands and grimace because I've somehow brought up a memory, one which I'd rather have forgotten. Something embarrassing.
It wouldn't be so bad if it was something out of my control. You know, like being pants'd in front of your crush or brushing your teeth with squeeze butter because your brother thought it'd be funny to refill your tube of toothpaste. Im talking about one of those moments you just want to smack yourself for.
One of my moments of regret took place about three years ago in Winn-Dixie. Im in the check out line at the end by the baggers. My Grandmother-in-law was buying us groceries because we were so tight financially. Already in an awkward position by having a woman I barely know buying us 200 dollars worth of groceries, I look down the isle at all the open lanes and catch someones glare. My Ex-boyfriends Father. That relationship didn't end the best way and it was the first time I've seen him since then. It didn't take me long to realize the position I was in. I immediately turned from him and assisted the clerk in bagging the groceries. I wanted to get out of there, and fast.
It wasn't just awkward seeing him again. There's a little more to it than that. I was married and Really pregnant at the time. I was about 100 pounds heavier than last time he saw me and to make matters even worse... due to my lack of maternity clothes, I had to dig up some old "favorites." One of which was his sons work shirt... which I just so happened to be wearing.
Even now I hang my head in shame as I relive that moment. How embarrassing! Yeah I know, there are moments way worse than that but something about that day continuously haunts me.
So, what's your story?
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